The Diving Board

I stare upwards at a huge ladder before me holding on to the icy metal bars, and take my first step. Reaching one more step every time hoping to make it to the top, I finally reach my goal to find a diving board and I are locking eyes. I cautiously step on. It creaks and groans as I start to prepare myself to take a jump, when my eyes catch a glimpse of the waters below me.

Darkness. Fear. Failure. Criticism. Backlash. Uncertainty. Disappointment.

These are the sharks that are swimming around my pool located in this "zone of the unknown" waiting to devour me before my feet even hit the water, and the swirling pool looks like a raging ocean in the midst of a horrible storm. I feel sick; my knees are knocking, my knuckles are whitening as I grip the metal bars unable to move. Paralyzed by fear. Complete and utter fear.

"Where is your God now?" the people below me cry out.
"Where is this God who promises to answer your prayers and comfort you in times of trouble?"
Like shrill voices their words come out, and criticism from those closest to me follows suit.
"But I thought you were called to do this and that?"
"Don't be silly Alecia God didn't tell you that."
"I don't understand why you would back out now when you are so close to finishing?!"

I cover my ears hoping to make the noise go away, but it only seems to get louder and louder the harder I press on my ears. I know I'm going to be sick for sure. I crawl backwards on the board so I cannot see anything below me, and I hug my knees to my chest, rocking back and forth like a child cowering during a thunderstorm.

"Alecia, you're an adult now so start acting like it! What do you think you're doing cowering in the corner? Take the plunge; the pains of regret and failure will only last....forever." THE VOICES; I just want the voices to stop! And who let me come up here anyway?

I hear something...footsteps. Someone else is coming up here! Maybe once they take make the jump I won't feel as scared, and by then I'll work up the courage to do it myself! Still unable to move, a hand touches my shoulder. It is gentle, yet strong, with a soft face to match. I turn around unsure, but the eyes of this man make me feel safe and secure.

"My daughter," He says in a gentle voice, "I am the Lord your God who will never leave you or forsake you. I call you out of places you are comfortable in and into places of uncertainty because you know that with Me all things are possible! Now rise! Take my hand and look into the waters down below you. What do you see?"

I cautiously rise with legs like jello, and move to the edge of the board. Looking down below me I see clear water like the sky on a beautiful sunny day. I see faith, obedience, trust, and success jumping and splashing with joy and contentment following them. I see the faces of those people criticizing me smile and laugh, cheering me on as I prepare to take the plunge.

A smile.
A deep breath.
Splash!